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The maker of all
human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or
year, due to the serious defect in the primary and central component of
the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units
code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same
defect in all subsequent units.
This defect has been technically termed, "subsequential Internal
Non-Morality", or more commonly known as S-I-N, as it is primarily
symptomized by loss of moral judgment. Some other symptoms:
(a) Loss of direction
(b) Foul vocal emissions
(c) Amnesia of origin
(d) Lack of peace and joy
(e) Selfish, or violent, behavior
(f) Depression or confusion in the mental component
(g) Fearful
The manufacturer, who is
neither liable or at fault for this defect, is providing factory
authorized repair and service, free of charge to correct this SIN
defect. The number to call for the recall station in your area is:
P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN by
pressing R-E-P-E-N-T-A-N-C-E. Next download J-E-S-U-S into the heart. No
matter how big or small the SIN defect is, the JESUS repair will replace
it with:
(a) Love
(b) Joy
(c) Peace
(d) Longsuffering
(e) Gentleness
(f) Goodness
(g) Faith
(h) Meekness
(i) Temperance
Please see operating manual, HOLY BIBLE, for further details on the use
of these fixes. WARNING. continuing to operate the human unit without
correction, voids the manufacturer's warranty, exposing owner to dangers
and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit
being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on
J-E-S-U-S
DANGER: The human units not
receiving this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace.
This Action was Authorized by The Creator
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